Do you remember when you got last praise ?

Do you like praise ?
Who does not?
Do you remember when you got last praise ?
Not remembering ?---no surprise .
Do you remember  when you last criticised someone?
Laughing---WHY?
I myself just criticised my wife for her habit of wasting time in seeing BIG BOSS serial. I just criticised my son for not starting the study.
I am sure ---you do not need to remmemeber when you crticisised someone for something.
It is a matter of routine rather than exception---why?
Why are we so miser in praise  .
Why not we use ability of human being to praise others .
Answer lies in our perception
Perhaps we think that criticism works more than that of praise.

But this is an  illusion.--this is not a fact .Skinner has proved over the dog . When a dog can be trained with the instrument of praise and reward ,WHY NOT WE PEOPLE?

To realise the power of praise --

Try from now---

Praise your wife .
Praise your son
Praise your friend 
Praise your brother 
Praise your sister
Praise your daughter
Praise your mother 
Praise your father
Praise employer 
Praise your boss
Praise your friend 
Praise your student
Praise everyone who come in your contact 
and you will see the wonder 
you will be surprised.

If it is difficult to praise any one --
praise yourself --
Yes, yourself (ironically , self -praise is also not common ) and you see the change .
Miracle will happen .

Yes ----Praise is the the strongest instrument to spur people for the success.

LET US USE THIS POWERFUL INSTRUMENT .

Praise the slightest improvement and praise every improvement .Be hearty in ypur approbation and lavish in your praise.------DALE CARNEGIE

Praise is like sunlight to the warm human spirit;we cannot flower and grow without it.And yet ,while most of us are only too ready to apply to others to the cold wind of criticism, we are somehow reluctant to give our fellow the warm sunshine of praise.----JESS LAIR (PSYCHOLOGIST)

no right to say or to do

I have no right to say or to do anything that diminishes a man in his own eyes .What matters is not what i think of him ,but what he thinks of himself.Hurting in this dinity is a crime 

ANTOINE DE SAINT-EXUPERY

JUXTAPOSE THE REWARD WITH THE DESIRED BEHAVIOUR

Now-a days,Delhi season is under change .Winter is knocking the door .
It is evening and i myself is feeling a bit of cold while my son ,11 yrs old is careless and is hardly listening to my suggestion to wear the sweater to overcome cold.Already he is having cold and his voice is choked.I asked him to wear the sweater indicating that he may be dropped from gymnastics team of his school due to illness Such veiled persuation  to wear had no impact .

After some time ,he wore sweater which was surprising to me .On probing i came across the fact that he wore sweater  because he was concerned that his  mother would not  give him "mixtures" to eat  unless he wore the sweater .

This event brought my attention to the importance of  immediate need of child..I was trying to have result based on fulfillment of  remote need  of child For a child, fulfillment of his distant need has little significance for immediate action ..

SO IN CONTEXT OF CHILD BEHAVIOR ,JUXTAPOSE THE REWARD WITH THE DESIRED BEHAVIOUR and that reward should be related to actual need of child (not the perceived need)

Appeal for nobler motives works

Sweeper of our complex is is a hard working lady.She does her work very nicely and is always courteous to all of us .But she does not have good relatioship with my  wife for the reasons beyond my understanding .There is often scuffle at the end of month during payment of service charge.She often want something more than service charge which my wife often used to decline .

Recently  she is going to marry her daughter and she handed over to my wife the invitation letter with a request to contribute something to meet expenses of marriage .

I was surprised my wife was kind enough to gift may things It was surprising for me .

I asked ----how you managed to gift so much of things 

She replied --it is marriage of her daughter and more than that it was helping towards  cause of a girl.I  being ,can understand it ---you cannot .

I myself felt proud of my wife .

I realized --appeal for nobler motives works .

Make husband /wife to say YES and win the race

It is a pleasant morning ---said wife to his husband?

Yes ,it is really pleasant .

How about to go for morning walk ?

Yes ,we can. 

Husband and wife went for a morning  walk.

During walk they talk lot of affirmative things which was puzzling to wife .Her husband was almost always on others side 

She was thinking --what has happened ? Why her husband is so positive in mood ?

She was just perplexed .

Do you know why it was so?

BECAUSE her wife had used unconciously of the Socrates method ----yes technique .

Once a person is in YES mode ,it is path of least resistance and one YES leads to another in a vicious cycle .

So always try to secure YES for initial talk .Never allow the person to say NO in the beginning of talk because one NO will lead to further NO to maintain the consisitency and to preserve the ego.It is almost impossible to change from NO  to YES.

SO make husband /wife to say YES  and win the race.

3rd The International Day of Radiology

This year, on November 8, the European Society of Radiology (ESR), the Radiological Society of North America (RSNA) and the American College of Radiology (ACR) will celebrate the third International Day of Radiology (IDoR 2014) with radiological societies the world over.

 The International Day of Radiology is an annual event which is held with the aim of building greater awareness of the value that radiology contributes to safe patient care, and improving understanding of the vital role radiologists play in the healthcare continuum.

We therefore chose November 8, the day that Wilhelm Conrad Röntgen discovered the existence of x-rays in 1895, as a day of action and awareness. We hope to alert the world to the stunning medical, scientific and even artistic possibilities of medical imaging, the essential role of the radiologist as a part of the healthcare team in countless medical scenarios, and the high educational and professional standards required of all staff working in medical imaging.

Brain imaging has been chosen as the main theme of the day, to highlight the important role that radiology plays in the detection, diagnosis and management of a wide variety of brain diseases.

source ---http://www.internationaldayofradiology.com/about-idor/

This concept benefited me enormously .

Accept your fault immediately and promptly-----

Easier said than to implement .

Everday we have experince of this fact .It is rare to accept wrongs if done .
Why?
Because it is taken as sign of weakness in routine process ,appears to downgrade the self-esteem and mind react very negatively.Defending a mistake is a routine response of human being.

But there is a universal concept of CAUSE AND EFFECT  and nothing can overcome it .If there is effect there is a cause ,although it may appear  be very subtle.If there is a cause,there would be effect .So if you have done wrong ,there would be effect  which may shift to  a distant future .And in such situation that effect may appear to have no cause.For a particular event ,cause has is to be there and  and that cause may date back even to  previous birth .
SO THERE IS NO WAY EXCEPT TO ACCEPT THE MISTAKE. 

Advantages of accepting mistake---

1.Accepting the  mistake require much courage and accepting the mistake is enough assurance to the person about his courageous attribute
2.removes the sense of guilt and defensiveness
3.helps to solve the problem that lead to mistake
4.gives feeling of nobility and exultation

Other side of the coin ----

When one accept the mistake ,very rarely the affected person respond in aggressive way .Starting oneself to condemn for mistake rarely invite rebuke from the affected person .Mostly become magnanimous to forgive/or show mercy  because candid acceptance of error  make that effected person important .And to be important is a big psychological need(rather craving)

So what to do when there is a mistake/error/fault?

Admit MISTAKE quickly and emphatically------Dale carnegie

I have used this concept of Dale Carnegie and it has benefited me enormously .